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Posted by Michelle C. on September 16, 2009, 2:31 pm
Great observations, Megan. Yes, the people on a list or in a newsgroup
may be able to be more objective. And the anonymity of the internet
also allows such people to share their personal experiences--something
some may be reluctant to do to people they face everyday.
Best regards,
Michelle in Nevada
Listpig wrote:
show/hide quoted text
> There are pluses and minuses to talking to folks who don't know you well
> when you're in a crisis; the pluses vastly outweigh the minuses in the short
> term, and maybe in the long term as well.
>
> There's no emotional baggage involved: because they *don't* know you, they
> aren't going to build expectations around how you "used to be" or "always
> are" or whatever of that ilk. Even when we don't mean to, we tend to be
> limiting in our support of people we know well---friends and
> family---because we think we know what they can---and can't, or won't---do.
> Makes it very hard to excel and be more than we thought we could be when our
> support system's version of "cheering us on" is a constant message of "YOU
> can't do that. You can't, you know. You're not capable. You're wasting
> your time trying. Just proves that once again you're out of touch with
> reality."
>
> Doesn't mean strangers are somehow morally better than the folks we know:
> could be that they're terribly hard on their friends and family. But
> there's something about the detachment involved in dealing with someone we
> don't know well enough to limit that frees us to perhaps be more encouraging
> than we usually are.
>
> --pig
>
>
> On 9/16/09 06:59, in article
> wsWdnW5GJajrXi3XnZ2dnUVZ8tqdnZ2d@brightview.co.uk, "Kate XXXXXX"
>
>>> Modern technologies such as face book have been instrumental in me
>>> getting some support and hearing of some experiences of others that are
>>> then encouraging to me.
>> This is good. Sometimes the truth of srangers, and their BTDT
>> understanding is of imense practical help. They empathise and
>> understand, are non-judgemental, and often give practical advice that
>> will get you through each day as it happens.
>
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>> getting some support and hearing of some experiences of others that are
>> then encouraging to me.
>
> This is good. Sometimes the truth of srangers, and their BTDT
> understanding is of imense practical help. They empathise and
> understand, are non-judgemental, and often give practical advice that
> will get you through each day as it happens.